I’ve got a Generic Viagra story that’s all about irony. The irony of fate! Ironic, is it not? The degree to which men can start sounding like women when it comes to their manhood? The slightest little problem, and we get more hysterical than any woman. Because, we must admit, women are practical in their way. If they have one of those problems they have down there, it’s off to ten doctors, and ten pharmacies, and they’re popping pills and applying creams until the problem goes away. Why is it so hard, then, for a man to order some Generic Viagra? There’s no denying that you have a little problem, dangling there lifelessly between your legs. You haven’t heard your woman groan in weeks, even months, and now you’re the one acting womanish. Instead of getting real and ordering some Generic Viagra – something you know will help-you refuse to admit that you need any help.

There are several stages of grief a man goes through when his Johnson craps out on him. Yes, it’s the same as losing a child. The first is denial, of course. I’m not ordering any Generic Viagra, because I don’t have a problem. Little Jimmy’s not dead! He’ll come around! He’s just sleeping! Slap him around a bit, he’ll stir back to life! Massage him or something. Stick his head in between a woman’s legs, and he’ll be roused from his slumber! Yeah, right. The fact is, he’s not going to respond to anything-especially not to wishful thinking-when he’s not getting the proper supply of blood. Generic Viagra can help with that. But no, you’d rather wallow in self-pity. I’m useless, I’m not a man, I’m a castrated, impotent, erectionless old stallion who’s ready to be put out to pasture, or shipped off to the glue factory. Sure, thoughts of death may creep in. If Little Jimmy can be cut down by fate, in the prime of his life, then why not us? This is when things get really heavy. You’ll find yourself dreaming about your high school days, when you’d get a world-class hard-on for anything that moved. Or college, when a night without sex was the exception, not the rule. Before you start living in the past, order some Generic Viagra, like I did, and get a second lease on life.

What’s the next womanish “stage of the grieving process,” without Generic Viagra? Acceptance, right? Think you’ll “make peace with your loss”? Or “find closure”? Give me a freaking break! The fact is, this is one loss a man can never make peace with, no matter how old he is. Here’s some more irony for you-a wise, beer-guzzling Czech novelist once said that young poets think of nothing but death, and old men think of nothing but women. What’s up with that? Better order some Generic Viagra – because even though you may be a little older, your desire for women is likely to increase, especially when you sense, in despair, that every woman you have may be your last! Don’t give in to despair, when you can take practical measures, like ordering Generic Viagra. While there’s still hot blood in your body, there’s a rock-hard erection left in your old soldier. Because erections are all about blood flow, as I said. Don’t be a woman-don’t bring psychology into it. It’s not head games, it’s not a matter of willpower. It’s all about circulation. With Generic Viagra, you’ll respond naturally to a woman’s touch, and with your towering erection, you’ll touch parts of her she didn’t even know existed. So, get over those womanish complexes and hysterics. Be a man, for crying out loud.